On church on Sunday, we had a guest speaker from Bethel church, Danny Silk. He has written many great books, and has some amazing teachings. It was one of those services I couldn’t take enough notes and I was left convicted.
It wasn’t a bad convicted, rather just what I needed. The Lord was definitely speaking to me throughout the service.
Having a child arrive in 13 weeks or possibly sooner, hopefully not later, is a scary prospect. I would say it’s common to have fears and maybe even doubts, and not entirely a bad thing, but when we lose perspective and lose trust in God, this is where our fear and doubts become a problem.
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As you all know I wasn’t expecting a child, nor did I want to get pregnant just 4 months after we said I do. There came a point in my pregnancy where I faced reality and became more accepting to our new addition. I begin to open my heart to trusting. I slowly became more excited for our little girl.
I have to admit though, I am still very scared about being a parent. As much as I love kids and have been around them most my life, I can’t seem to wrap my head around caring for one 24/7. I am still learning to except God’s plan.
There’s lots of questions I have for Him. “Why me? Why now?” Lots of conversations I have with him. “I don’t understand your plan. I don’t understand where I am going, or why you chose now.” “Why is this happening? How am I supposed to do this?”
I became the judge of God.…..Let me explain.
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We know the Bible doesn’t lie and the Bible says that “God is good….” not just sometimes but “God is good ALL the time.” Our speaker at church said when we don’t believe “God is good ALL the time” we become God’s judge…if we removes ourselves from “God is good” we become God’s judge. We begin to think we can do it better or know better, or are better.
Even though I wasn’t aware I was being a judge, I most certainly was. I thought my plans were better than His, as I lost sight of His everlasting goodness. I never truly thanked Him for his goodness in all this. For the blessing and gift of a child. For His plan and purpose.
Now this doesn’t mean that we won’t suffer or that there won’t be sacrifices; that our lives will be all roses and butterflies. We are told that being a Christian has trials and tribulations.
We are also reminded of His promises. We may suffer, but through our suffering comes greatness, blessings and growth.
“More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” – Romans 5:3-5
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you” – Isaiah 43:2
“Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” – Matthew 5:10
I think of running. There are races where I definitely suffer, or runs before the races in preparation for the race where it hurts, but the outcome is always great. The feeling of accomplishment when crossing the finish line beats out all the suffering.
I need to realize that even in my suffering or uncertainty, God is Good. He already has a plan, much greater than I could imagine. How could I doubt His plans, His goodness? How could I judge His plans, His provisions? “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” – Deuteronomy 31:6
I may not know how God will provide or what exactly His plan is for our growing family, but I do know that it is far greater than any plan I could have made. I do know His goodness is ALL the time.
Until Next Time Be Whole and Be Fit
Thoughts? How do you remind yourself that God is good ALL the time?
Yes God is Good all the time!! I agree completely. I can understand your frustration with getting pregnant before you wanted to, I went through the same thing with my little girl, who is now 3. Let me just say that she is an overwhelming blessing and I was humbled at her birth because Gods grace was so abundant and He became to reveal and show me more of Himself and His plans for me life. God gave you a child because He knows that you will trust in His Strength to bring her up and teach her His ways. My prayer after “my plans” got changed with the blessing of my little girl has been “Father not my will but your will, lead me and show me by your Holy Spirit what you desire for my life.” I can’t say I always get it but I’m learning. Jesus did whatever the Father desired Him to do and he didn’t move or speak without the Fathers direction so why would I think I would know better? How I remind myself that God is Good is by reminding myself of all the times He has come through for me and answered my prayers or changed my heart for His Glory. You are a very spiritual and deep person Bry and I believe you will make a wonderful mother. All of your feelings are normal, I had them all as well but you will be surprised how easy motherhood will come to you. Trust in His Love for you and follow His lead, He always surpassss our expectations and for the better 🙂
Thank you so much for this Kristie. I have definitely been working on changing my mindset and recognizing His plans as being better. I have started to say something I am thankful for everyday to help remind myself of how good God is. Thank you for this encouragement.
Reaaly like your blog entries, but the poster with the Prefontaine quote is actually a well-known adage by the great inventor Thomas Alva Edison.