Wow! It has been way too long since I have written a blog post. I hate to be cliché, but life is busy. When you have 4 kids and they are in activities, you’re volunteering in church, you’re coaching, working multiple jobs and homeschooling – time is limited and valuable. I often choose quality moments with my children over staring at the screen any longer. And it seems I don’t sit long enough to do much of anything …… life with kids.
Today’s topic may be heavy and stir up feelings. It’s relevant for today though, as moms and dads, are pulled every which way. We are told what’s best for us and our kids. Modern culture is swaying us on a daily basis – typically away from our inner values and toward what is considered the “norm” or “successful.”
Lets dive right into some examples of the pressures we feel on a daily basis as parents. First, we are told that success is measured by the size of our house, the size of our paycheck, the title next to our name, the likes on Instagram or facebook, our views on youtube. I am here to scream FALSE! We aren’t defined by our house, job, education, social media or title. Some of the most influential people in my life never attended college and came from humble beginnings, but are winning souls for Jesus on a daily basis and saving kids out of sexual slavery by the thousands. They are feeding thousands up on thousands of people every month, building orphanages and safe houses, building homes for widows and much more. Never recognized on TV or in the News. To the world they aren’t deemed as successful simply, because they aren’t a doctor or lawyer, they don’t make millions, they’ve never been on TV.
God judges our fruit not the size of our house or paycheck. He is not concerned with the world’s version of success or the title next to our name. This brings me to MOMs. Many of use are stay-at-home moms now, simply because we see the turn in values in our society and the war on our children. We value their life above our own, and selflessly give of our time, efforts, and resources, putting aside ourself. We would lay down our life for our kids. We sacrifice sometimes our own ambitions to make sure our kids have all they need. We will probably never be on TV or may not have a large following, but our reward is in heaven.
The world pressures us to “get a real job” – tells us daily how unimportant stay-at-home moms are. Questions what “we do all day.” Esteems those working outside the home as better, but this isn’t right. I don’t esteem another mom over another based on if they are a doctor or a homeschool mom. All moms are important and all moms need support. Instead of degrading one another, we should value each others role and recognize that the job of “MOM” is not for the faint of heart. That God has separate paths for everyone, some in the home and some outside the home, but both require sacrifice.
So let this be a gentle reminder that you are important and you are accountable to God one day. Not the world. Our standard is not the world. Our standard is not even our parents, friends or other family members. Stay true to you. If you have decided staying home with the kids is what God has called you to, then own it proudly. Respect that another mom has a different calling, but don’t compare yourself to her. Don’t feel less significant because you don’t make six figures or you didn’t get that PhD, or never made it big as a TV star. God is more concerned with our hearts and stewarding what He has given us, whether it’s a PhD or homeschooling 7 kids, than He is with the size of our following or title.
I have my Masters, but I am more proud of my role as a mom than any title next to my name. I am thankful I can spend my days with my children, because as we assessed from the beginning it goes way to fast. I am learning to let go of the world’s standards and even the standards of my own family. I am owning my role as a homeschooling mom. I am learning to recognize my significance and understand my value isn’t in this world, its in HIM.
My approval is not from man, but I seek His will. It has taken me nearly 8 years of parenting to realize that it’s okay to be a stay-at-home mom. I am not any less significant. It’s okay to have my own goals and ambitions, while understanding I am in a different season right now. I haven’t put my ambitions on hold, rather I have learned to mold and shape them into my motherhood. They have changed as I have accepted this role of MOM. As I let go of the need to seek man’s approval and make even members of my own family happy, I have found freedom and a new love of my role. I no longer feel insignificant nor embarrassed to say I “just” homeschool and “just” work from home (why I ever thought it was embarrassing I don’t know). Never say you are “just a stay-at-home mom.”
After years of parenting, I am now realizing homeschooling and staying home is hard work, but the most rewarding. And now more than ever it’s important. Our society is targeting our kids everywhere we turn – so now more than ever I realize why God called me here. I realized we can’t get time back. I own my role and find the sacrifice is worth it.
I let go of others opinions and instead seek Him and His will. Because as I stated earlier we are accountable to God – not to man. His opinion is worth more than anyone’s.
So if you are struggling to find your value as a mom – remember whose image you are created in. Remember there are many stay-at-home moms. Many homeschooling mamas. There are many of us standing for our children and their futures, and doing what God has called us to do. You are important, and believe me in God’s eyes He sees you as successful. Own your responsibility as a stay-at-home mom and be all the way in!!
“Disclaimer: I am not in any way saying that a stay-at-home mom is superior to working moms. That would defeat the purpose of this post, I am merely encouraging those moms who have chosen to stay-at-home to own their responsibility and understand they are important too. Their value is not measured by anything other than who they are in HIM.”
Until next time Be WHOLE, Be FIT & BE YOU!!